The Unholy Review

Disclaimer: Contains spoilers!

Plot Summary: A priest is given charge of a cursed church where he must do battle with the "unholy!"

Review: This is one of the most bizarre movies I've watched in a while. Like many of the more stupid horror movies, this film is a mess with no idea of the direction it wanted to go in. Apparently every Easter some temptress-esque demon known only as the "unholy" tries to seduce the priest of some church. If the priest gives in to the temptation, she can kill him and send him to hell as a sacrifice. We are never told what this sacrifice accomplishes except maybe to make Satan or whoever happy. It is implied "she" gets more time on earth, but then how does she go years without making the sacrifice, but for a while was doing it every year? Other than that discrepancy, the "unholy" herself does not look the part; I would have given points had she been super hot or something to fit the role of seductress, but come on! Eh, I suppose maybe she's 80s hot, but not even in my opinion. She can change form, but that was like a split second so another wasted point. As for the many plot points that go nowhere: the main priest, Father Michael, fell off a building and did not die for no reason, there are two weird priests who know everything but choose to say nothing, some weird guy claiming to be possessed, some bar owner, named Luke (who dresses ridiculously) claiming he's haunted yet ambigously hoaxing it, some girl who likes Father Michael but is also haunted for no reason. Like I said: a mess. Most of this shit could be forgiven if the movie weren't so boring or at least had some kind of payoff or scares. We don't even get a good reason why the "unholy" is running about except for the vague implication it is because of a statue the church got from another country. This movie is not scary, the special effects suck, lame characters with many throwaways, directionless and senseless plot, and boring to boot. I still feel my rating is a little high, but it's only because I feel there was potential here that just got lost along the way.

Notable Moment: When we see Luke's favorite outfit meticulously hanging up exasperating how ridiculous it actually is! I mean seriously, I was wondering if the guy even owned other clothes.

Final Rating: 4/10