The Purge Review

Disclaimer: Contains spoilers!

Plot Summary: In a futuristic USA, most societal problems have been alleviated by allowing all crime to be legal one day a year.

Review: By now you're probably just about done scarfing down all that Halloween candy and maybe regretting it. Don't tell me I'm the only one still eating Halloween candy by Christmas? Admit it. Well, I have the perfect movie to help you rid yourself of all that excess sugar: "The Purge!" It's about losing weight and working out and it's really awesome--oh, wait, what? It's about a stupid family in the future terrorized by rejects from "The Strangers" on a made up holiday?! That can't be right. Okay, it's like the year 2100 or something, right? 2022?! So not even a decade away? Perfect. Alright, fine, then it must be an amazing morality tale and reveal some insight about human nature, correct? All that happens is some rich family unwillingly protects a random guy from said flunkies from "The Strangers?!!" Are you fucking kidding me? I have watched so many shitty movies in my life, but few have made me as angry as this instance. I guess it's my own fault, because I believed reviews and others saying this was a good film. I should have stuck with my gut feeling which is why I never rushed out to see this garbage before, but I would have never imagined this movie to be as stupid and aggravating as it turned out to be (I'm seriously clenching my fists in frustration while trying to type).

So what do we really have here? Basically, we have a bullshit holiday where you can commit crime without consequence which apparently led to wannabe "The Strangers" losers (called purgers) trying to kill anyone that gets in their way. I cannot emphasize how much these so-called purgers ripoff the already shitty "The Strangers" in their look, presentation, and pretentiously "creepy" mannerisms. The main cast is some rich family, called the Sandins, whose son tries to help a guy the purgers are trying to kill. If this weren't stupid enough, the daughter's boyfriend tries to kill the dad amidst this idiocy. Eventually the Sandins decide they will help this random guy and there is a brief transition into an action film as most of these rejects die. After the dad dies, the neighbors of the Sandins kill all the remaining purgers so that they can have the pleasure of killing the Sandins themselves. The random guy they had been protecting eventually saves them, even though they were assholes to him, and the movie ends with them releasing the remaining neighbors as the purge is over...till next time! There is never even a reason why the purgers were trying to kill this particular guy other than the fact that he fought back; so don't expect any big twists. We never even get to see what's really going on in the rest of the country which was lame as hell.

I hardly know how to approach all that is wrong here, but I suppose the thing that bothered me most was the absolute implausibility of the situation. "But Ryan, look at all the farfetched movies you've reviewed?" Those had a certain presentation that allowed your mind to be at ease and accept the situation at hand. For example, this movie, for some reason, made me think of "Killer Klowns From Outer Space" since that is one of the most outlandish movies there ever was, and I kept thinking, it was more plausible for aliens that look like clowns and turn people into cotton candy to be real than this movies' premise! It's mostly the year that is the problem as nine years is hardly enough time to establish this much bullshit. Just think for a moment, would it be possible in the next nine years for a new government to come into power, society not to immediately crumble as a sideffect, a holiday that violates every law introduced and accepted into society to the point that it already has traditions, and at no point is there any resistance? And I need to emphasize that there are traditions! Seriously, who thought up this "holiday?" Coke and Hallmark? There's something so immature to the thinking of the plot which could have actually worked under different circumstances.

I could not suspend my disbelief long enough to stop thinking up reasons why this would never work. They pitch this notion that society has miraculously become idyllic due to allowing crime legal for a day, yet never address all the problems of cleaning up after the day. Imagine how much of a pain in the ass it is to clean up after a party and this would be a nationwide trashing. Hospitals, the police, etc. would be busy for weeks trying to deal with the aftermath. Then you have to deal with the casualties and how they may affect society due to their deaths. For example, I'm sure many would love to kill their bosses, so you'd have tons of businesses down their leaders. Plus, how do you cope with families that may have been destroyed along the way? Also, what is there to stop me from seeking revenge other times of the year? And why the fuck would I stop killing because some little bell rings? Who would be able to prove I didn't kill someone beforehand? There are like a million loopholes--I've never even heard of such a flawed plot. But screw that...the thing that irked me most was the only people who cannot be killed by the fucking purge are government leaders?! There is the obvious implication that a government collapse occurred in this future creating this dystopian reality, and yet I cannot kill the people most likely behind the cause for its creation? Pst, I scoff at that notion...I'd be after their heads first. And where does the rest of the world play into this stupid dreamworld? Are you honestly saying, movie, that the USA could collapse and not have collateral damage? And where is the damned resistance that would be trying to stop all of this? Not many people would put up with this bullshit even as zombified as the public has become. This is why I don't want to review movies like this because they force me to address my hatred for modern society and utter disdain for my already corrupt government! Ahhh, I need to relax. It's just a shitty movie, Ryan. Think of Rika--calm yourself.

Okay, so back to the whole immaturity of it all. Being able to commit any crime once a year would create more crime than it would prevent. For one, it establishes a lot of vengeful individuals who would want payback for whatever happened to them. But besides that, the movie has nooooo fucking clue what causes crime--in this country at least. Very briefly is there a radio host, in the background, discussing that the purge protects the rich and leaves the poor to fend for themselves in the onslaught. While that is a decent point, this movie fails to understand that the worst crimes are committed at the top rung of society through corporations and the government who can hide behind laws they create. On top of that, because they act through organizations, there isn't a single individual to blame per se. The imbalances in societal structure creates crime followed by the idiotic policies like drug laws that are funded by the government who are also the main importers of said drugs creating the so-called revolving door with the prisons. Oh forget it, I can ramble on all day about the senselessness of it all. Suffice to say, there was not a lot of thought going into the finer details of the plot, and it doesn't matter because this film did not demand any kind of deeper introspection. I'll give this film some credit in that respect--they never tried to be pretentious because they were too stupid to even try to propose some insight.

Needless to say, I hate this movie. Every single aspect of the plot is retarded and implausible without a clearer understanding of the inception. It's not far enough in the future to come off as possible considering the drastic change that is presented. While it may have been a cool concept at the heart of it all, it was put in the hands of an incompetent writer with an immature understanding of crime, society, and human nature. The worst aspect was the inclusion of the purgers who end up stealing the show in the worst of ways. Background plotlines are equally stupid and serve to pad out the film when that could have been replaced with shots of the whole country facing the purge. The only good points were that the production values were respectable, and I do think Ethan Hawke is a good actor in pretty much everything no matter how bad it is. Obviously avoid this hot mess unless you lack the capability to clearly see the abundantly visible flaws inherent to the plot. It wasn't called "The Purge" for nothing--I'd rather be purging all night than watch this shit ever again.

Notable Moment: When James rampages and kills a ton of purgers. If only this kind of action was what this movie were all about.

Final Rating: 4/10