Disclaimer: Contains spoilers!
Plot Summary: This time something totally amazing happens...oh, wait, no, another idiot summons Pumpkinhead.
Review: Arrrggghhhh. I know there were only four of these movies, but it was hard to get through them. Honestly, the only more insufferable franchises I can think of are "Puppetmaster" and "Witchcraft." But at least "Puppetmaster" became self-aware at one point, and, well, "Witchcraft" might actually be the worst horror franchise in existence so that's not saying much. As far as this film goes, it was seriously testing my patience, and I could only tolerate, at most, 15 minute intervals at a time spread out over three days; even "Asian School Girls" and "Howling VII" I was able to finish the same day! My god, I need to make sure next month I watch nothing but movies I already like, because the recent level of shit I've watched is making my left eye twitch or something.
The story is beyond stupid combining a wannabe "Romeo and Juliet" plot with the Hatfield and McCoy conflict (a moronic incident unto itself). Don't ask me how any of this still has to do with the town from part one, because they claim it does. That fucking witch is still running around trying too hard to act mysterious except even she sees the ghost of Ed now. Hell, everyone sees the ghost of Ed now. Okay, it sort of made sense in part 3 since he was the host for Pumpkinhead, but what the fuck? I think it also goes without saying this has absolutely nothing to do with the events of part 3 which you'd think people would have remembered Pumpkinhead, right? There is a subplot about the town sheriff having a run in with Pumpkinhead but who cares? The idiot in question that summoned Pumpkinhead was angry his sister died due to this stupid family conflict. By the way, Pumpkinhead is just a plot device yet again and looks like shit, but there was slightly less CGI so there's that. There are too many stupid moments that it becomes impossible to address them all. One of the worst is when a wedding gets crashed and when they burn down a house. I couldn't remember who characters were, yet again, since there were too many fucking inbred cousins to keep track of. Speaking of which, what is with these damn 1800s rejects? While I'm sure there are weirdos like this roaming the USA somewhere, I've yet to run into anyone flat out living and dressing like it's 1850. "Best moonshine in the county!" Yeah...best fucking moonshine in the county, asshole? Oh good lord help me! The movie tries to play up the drama, but it's hard to care about these people when they're this stupid and annoying. The only consolation is that most do die gruesomely, but it wasn't enough to satisfy me since, like I said, I didn't know who the hell half these people were. They also brought back that horrible dubbing that makes each scene that more excruciating to endure. Pumpkinhead dies the same way as he always does when the person summoning him gets killed. I guess he falls into a well that leads to hell or something...whatever.
Finally, by the mercy of Rika, this nightmare ends. I mean, what can I say? The first movie was merely okay--not good but not bad. The second film was terrible but it had one of my goddesses, Ami Dolenz, to sweeten the situation a tad. Part three managed to be even worse, but Pinhead appeared to be taking the role seriously so there was at least one saving grace. But this film has absolutely nothing except a few decent gore effects. You know, if you want to have all these stupid inbred freaks from the 1800s, why not finally make a "Pumpkinhead" sequel that explains the origins of the damned creature! Wouldn't that have made for a better film? You could even have a twist where you realize the last survivor is the woman that would become the witch. Hell, I'd write the stupid script myself if someone paid me, but I sure as hell don't care enough to do it for fun. In closing, I hate these movies.
Notable Moment: When some stupid old lady is screaming for help in a burning house. How about you shut the fuck up for two seconds and walk out the door!
Final Rating: 3/10
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