Disclaimer: Contains spoilers!
Plot Summary: Years after Billy went on a Christmas killing spree, his brother, Ricky, tries to pick up where he left off.
Review: GARBAGE DAY! Yes, this is that movie. If you're thinking, "what the hell is this guy talking about now," just type those two words into youtube and behold. Anyway, this film is painful but in the best of ways. And don't even try and say this was a comedy horror. No it wasn't. In fact, this film's attempt to be taken seriously is precisely what made it so damn funny. Every single line spoken by the Ricky character is pure gold with over the top delivery. However, setting aside all of the unintentionally humorous moments, they pulled a "Ju-on: The Curse 2" on us. About half of this film is nothing more than a recap of the events from SN,DN part one. Apparently the production of this film was plagued with all manner of financial issues. Nevertheless, it's the major detractor from what could have been a "Troll 2-esque" experience.
Well, you know this movie is off to a perfect start when they can't even get Billy-boy's age correct from the last film. It would seem Ricky has already been institutionalized for various murders that he's about to tell us about conveniently. But before we can get into that, we have to pad out the clock with 40 minutes of scenes Ricky clearly wasn't witness to--nor was any living person for that matter. In case you may be wondering, and because it's impossible to tell, it's actually supposed to be Christmas Eve. Because what criminal isn't pointlessly psychoanalyzed on Christmas Eve? After showing the best parts from the first film, and with plenty of cornball banter mixed in, we finally learn about Ricky's life. Unlike Billy-boy, Ricky appears to have a normal life yet becomes a killer anyway. Hold on...were they actually trying to be clever here and say that Billy was nurtured into a killer and Ricky was naturally a killer? Nah...that would be far, far too deep for this movie. Besides, GARBAGE DAY!
One day when Ricky was randomly roaming around being emo, he just happened to come across a chick about to get raped similarly to that beloved milf molestation of part one. Yeaaah, okay. And you were a baby, dude, and inside the damn car and wouldn't have seen jackshit. Ricky decides to kill the guy with his own car made possible through apparent teleportation. Unlike that ungrateful bitch from part one, this chick is thankful for Ricky's services. 'Kaaaay...it's still not Christmas. Later on, Ricky kills another guy who was, I guess, an enforcer for criminals. This time around Ricky thinks he's the fucking Penguin and uses an umbrella. We suddenly switch tone as Ricky meets a decently hot chick, named Jennifer, who is used goods it would seem. They clearly didn't have this little romance thought out very well. After de-virginizing our dear Ricky, he's instantly in love until they go to the movie theater one day. Ignoring the fact that the seats look as though they were designed for children, and that the lights are on, and that there was an annoying loudmouth to distract Ricky, AND the unbelievably surreal notion that the movie being played is, in fact, "Silent Night, Deadly Night," what are the odds that Jennifer's ex-boyfriend would materialize out of thin air at this exact movie and spot her in the crowd?! All I know is that I'm glad he was introduced in that roundabout way so I will know who he is in the next scene...making this ridiculous scene completely irrelevant.
Before you can even say, still a better love story than "Twilight," Ricky and Jennifer are walking along when they come across that ex-boyfriend again. Of course he starts talking smack and Ricky kills him thankfully. Jennifer doesn't take too kindly to this which leads to Ricky putting her down as well. Another person materializes out of thin air--a cop this time--who is killed due to sheer idiocy. This is when it occurs to Ricky that it's GARBAGE DAY, and he must shoot as many people as possible while laughing in the cheesiest way possible. When he is corned by police, he attempts to shoot himself but the bullets are out. And that's the greatest story ever told...or something along those lines. Suddenly realizing it's Christmas Eve, Ricky escapes the mental institute, or wherever, and decides he has to kill that nun from the first film. Magically stealing a Santa suit, and pulling the nun's address and phone number out of his ass, Ricky goes to find the old bitch who gives the killer way too much trouble considering she's in a wheelchair. When the police catch up to Ricky, he has already beheaded the nun, and the cops shoot Ricky. The film ends with Ricky still alive as you'd probably guess.
Wow, for a film about a killer Santa this had maybe two minutes of that action. What can I say...the story is a mess and half of it is filler to boot. The film fails in almost every technical aspect while having laughably bad acting. There is almost no positive thing I could say this film did...except that it is hilarious. Sure, it's not as fall over funny as the likes of "The Room," but SN,DN2 is especially pathetic. You kind of have to see the stupidity for yourself to fully appreciate it, but, at the same time, I obviously can't recommend this kind of trash--and trash gets taken out on (puts on sunglasses) garbage day! WAAAAAAAAAH!
Notable Moment: I would be doing a great disservice to this film's legacy if I put any other scene than GARBAGE DAY (tired of that joke yet?). Although, it should be noted that this film is loaded with outlandish moments.
Final Rating: 4/10
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