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Monday, February 2, 2015
Zeiram Review
Disclaimer: Contains spoilers!
Plot Summary: A bounty hunter attempts to capture an alien before he can wreak havoc on Earth.
Review: Some may be familiar with the anime, "Iria: Zeiram the Animation," which serves as a prequel to this film and the sequel, "Zeiram 2." Well, these are live action films that are kind of a cross between "The Terminator," "The Thing," and "Power Rangers." That probably sounds like an unusual mixture, and it certainly is, but it works well enough. The only downside to this film, however, is the lack of action. I was expecting things to be relentless or at least have an interesting story to help move you along through the slower parts but nope. More to the point, the film hypes up the main character, Iria, as if she is going to have a crazy battle against this hulking, mutating, seemingly immortal alien, Zeiram. In actuality, she fights Zeiram once early into the film and then two Jar Jar-esque humans get stuck doing the rest until Iria shows up again at the end. Oh come on!
We don't get a lot of back story as to what the hell is going on; the anime serves to fill in these gaps. All we know is that Zeiram is an alien bio-weapon that is extremely powerful and hard to kill. They don't even explain why he comes to Earth either. Iria is also an alien, but it's convenient that she looks Japanese, learned the language, and has been hanging out in an area close to Zeiram's trajectory. Iria is a bounty hunter working with her AI helper, Bob (though, he's not really an AI). I will note Iria looks pretty cool, and I like her gadgets she uses to fight Zeiram--I just wish they spent more time focusing on that. Anyway, Iria and Bob want to capture Zeiram for the money, obviously, but Bob is worried because Zeiram's power level is OVER 9000! Sorry, that joke is getting old, I know. Actually, his power level is over 87...whatever that is supposed to mean. Speaking of which, Zeiram himself (or herself) is an interesting concept and looks impressive. Each time Zeiram takes substantial damage he mutates with each form feeling distinct and menacing. The special effects were a surprising highpoint, and I think they still hold up well enough.
Iria and Bob have set up a pocket dimension for Zeiram to slip into, when he arrives on Earth, so he cannot kill any humans. It also provides plenty of room and a controlled environment for Iria to fight Zeiram. Unfortunately, the story quickly becomes hindered by the introduction of two goofball electricians who screw everything up. When Iria prepares to enter the dimension, those two idiots get pulled in with her. It's not a big deal at first since Iria has a respectably cool fight against Zeiram in which she triumphs; she puts Zeiram in a kind of stasis for transport. When Iria goes to teleport out of the dimension, a pain in the ass Zeiram clone goes with her and breaks the machine; the Zeiram clones are stupid bitches he can create when he eats people. With Iria stuck on Earth, the two idiots must fight another Zeiram clone alone. Though they do kill the clone, they idiotically shoot the stasis control on the real Zeiram--freeing him once more. This scene is followed by a huge chunk of the film dedicated to these two fools running around screaming with Zeiram always in hot pursuit. Who thought this would be a good idea? After much annoyance, Iria manages to get back into the dimension and save their candy asses. Iria blows Zeiram up, and he turns into a skeleton-like monster that they think a rare weapon will eliminate. Iria shoots Zeiram with this gun and the main chunk of Zeiram's head still is alive, but Iria puts it in stasis.
Trying to learn from the mistake of earlier, Iria lets the two idiots teleport back to Earth first where Zeiram breaks free and breaks the machine once again. Oh good lord. Now Iria is trapped in the dimension and those morons are stuck fighting Zeiram on Earth; Zeiram also takes on a new monster form. With the dimension they created collapsing, one of the dumb electricians conveniently uses his skills to fix the machine and bring Iria back. The film ends with Iria anticlimactically shooting Zeiram to death, and then having her picture taken with those imbeciles as if they somehow helped.
If you took away the Jar Jar antics, the lackluster defeat for Zeiram, and filled in a few details, this would have been significantly better. The action scenes that are here were decent, and the special effects were commendable for the time. Iria is a badass character in theory, but her execution was lacking and undermined when they focus on the Jar Jars instead. Zeiram was an awesome creation and one that needed more exploration in this film rather than through sequels. Overall, this is a film that could have been cheesy awesomeness, but, instead, turns out mediocre due to poor decisions in how to present the story.
Notable Moment: When Zeiram transforms into the skeleton form. While obviously inspired by the terminator, I liked the concept and the stop motion wasn't bad for that time.
Final Rating: 5.5/10
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