Stay Alive (2006) Review

Disclaimer: Contains spoilers!

Plot Summary: A group of friends are killed one by one after playing a cursed video game.

Review: In an era of horror when everything can be haunted, whether it be a VHS tape, website, or even a video file, why not a video game? Similarly to "Grandma's Boy," it took me multiple viewings before the charm began to warm me up to the ridiculously contrived and asinine story. In fact, I really enjoy the video game depicted and wish it were real. Unfortunately, that is pretty much the only thing praiseworthy. The plot is moronic, the characters are stupid and annoying, the CGI looks pitiful, and the ending makes no sense. However, if you can set aside the mistakes, and somehow appreciate the core ideas, you may find yourself entertained...or you may think this is one of the dumbest movies ever. Whichever. One caveat to keep in mind: there is a theatrical and unrated version. Typically the unrated versions are a gimmick to sell DVDs, but, in this case, it adds a good 15 minutes of footage that does add to the story.

The film opens by killing Peter Petrelli. No! One thing you'll notice from the get-go, besides the characters having fake-sounding names, is that you die in reality the way you die in the game. Yes, it's cliche as hell, but it works in the context of the movie. Anyway, Peter was play-testing for a game called, you guessed it, Stay Alive. In light of his death, the game is passed to his sort-of brother and main character, Hutch. Another thing you'll notice is that all the characters have forced backstories that are never explored and serve no purpose whatsoever except as laughable character development. You know, this script reads a lot like a story written by a teenager. So one of Hutch's friends decides they should all play the game which a total of 6 characters do. By the way, how the hell are 6 people, including a guy across town, playing the same game on 6 different screens with only one game disc among them?!

To the film's credit, the game is innovative and imagined to be more advanced than what we have now. You have a voice-activated start, an open-world survival horror, drop in and drop out co-op of at least 6 players, decent character and weapon customization, and perma-death. I don't know about you, but this is just the kind of game I'd love to see. Sure, there are a handful of games that are kind of at this level, but they don't fully capture the gameplay portrayed in the film. As you might suspect, the characters start to get killed in the game and, thus, die in real life. They introduce a pointless detective subplot whereby Hutch is suspected of killing everyone in the movie, but that is just one of many missteps. Another bullshit aspect is when people who haven't died in the game start to die since, I suppose, real life and the game world cross paths.

They drop the ball quite a bit in the scares department. Besides having far, far too many jump scares--retarded jump scares at that--the film can't make up its mind if they want to use makeup effects or shitty CGI. Surprisingly, a few of the ghosts we see wearing makeup look awesome. The CGI ghosts, on the other hand, are on par with what the sci-fi channel is working with. The source of this bullshit ghost story is a nonsensical interpretation of the real life killer, Elizabeth Bathory. Even though Elizabeth Bathory, who lived in Hungary, was long since dead before the USA even existed, apparently she found her way to Louisiana in the 1800s or something. Psh...that's certainly a good one. There is also something about roses, a spell book, and fucking nails in the head or whatever. Riiiight. Suffice it to say, everyone gets killed except Hutch, the token love interest, and Malcolm in the middle. Hutch seemingly destroys Elizabeth Bathory's spirit yet the movie ends with Stay Alive being released to retail stores. Uhh...okay. Never mind that the creator of the game died and the only existing copy was presumably destroyed or in an evidence locker somewhere.

I realize this movie probably sounds like trash, but it has its moments. The video game itself is presented well and looks to be a lot of fun. The makeup effects, when utilized, are commendable, and there is an unspoken charm presented. If only the story didn't feel so fucking amateur it would be more appealing. The problems with the film, as a whole, are quite glaring and all the hate this film receives is justifiable. Undeniably, the characters are stupid and do idiotic things, there are too many jumps scares, and the Elizabeth Bathory plot element is botched and concludes nonsensically. Believe it or not though, I'd still recommend this film but in the same way I'd recommend "Grandma's Boy." You will either appreciate the charm or think it sucks--I don't imagine much grey area in between.

Notable Moment: When a Cajun-sounding Elmer Fudd is bullshitting the audience about Elizabeth Bathory. No wonder this scene was cut from the theatrical version!

Final Rating: 5.5/10