Disclaimer: Contains spoilers!
Plot Summary: Insufferable assholes run a stupid amusement park as shenanigans unfold.
Review: God fucking damn this was one of the worst movies I've ever tortured myself with! Look over this blog...you know the kind of trash I've reviewed over the years...and this ranks right alongside the worst of them now. I can definitively make this statement: this is the worst movie I've watched theatrically. Dear lord what the fuck were they thinking with this?! The only true solace was that me and my crew were the only people in the theater which meant we could openly trash the movie to each other. I wanted to throw my popcorn at the damn screen. You mother fuckers. Mercifully, "Action Point" is bombing to hell and back which is a good sign.
Don't ask me why I'm watching this shit instead of pumping out my reviews for Asian horror month. I'm sorry--I failed in that regard. Instead, you get to read about this shit. Yippee! Actually, I had wanted to see "Adrift" but ended up seeing this atrocity instead. Oh well. Basically, the most punchable characters in existence run an amusement park in the most idiotic of ways. The film pretends like this would be super popular when in reality no one in their right mind would pay to visit this shit. I kind of appreciated the idea they were going for what with how people used to not be pussies in the past, but this idea is quickly squandered with more emphasis placed upon scenes of alleged zany hijinks. More to the point, the entire movie feels like a collection of individual scenes that were just glued together by this weak story of keeping an amusement park open. Every character is annoying and you want to brutally murder them with your bare hands...well, at least I did. Teehee! Apparently the filmmakers thought you'd care about these clowns but you won't. There is one character in particular that has a hatchet that made my blood boil. UGH! Every joke and gag falls flat and is utterly pathetic. I can't even imagine the stoner crowd laughing at this.
I don't know what anyone involved was thinking, but this was an absolute disgrace to film itself. This is the kind of movie so bad it makes you question what you're doing with your life that you've resorted to watching this. This movie made me angry--VERY angry! I might spiral into a homicidal rage easier than most, but I'm quite confident this level of idiocy could turn the average film-goer into a maniac. Yes, it's that bad! Finally, I want to acknowledge that, while I've certainly reviewed significantly worse films over the years, none of that other shit had a real budget or advertising to match this movie. I mean, did anyone expect things like "Howling 7," "Sleepaway Camp IV," or "Severed" to ever actually succeed? C'mon, son. That's the real difference in why "Action Point" is so egregious. This film belongs in hell, and I'm gonna see it gets there.
Notable Moment: When that moron with the hatchet gets his girlfriend. That was the moment I had enough. The line delivery was so horrendously bad that I could no longer contain myself after that. ARGH! This fucking movie.
Final Rating: 2.5/10
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