Howling VI: The Freaks Review

Disclaimer: Contains spoilers!

Plot Summary: A werewolf travels across the country seeking revenge against his maker.

Review: While "Howling VI" is generally one of the better films in the franchise, it simply has too many holes to overlook. Sure, part 5's plot was Swiss cheese at various parts, but a lot of those problems can be explained away through in-film inferences. Here, there's virtually no conceivable way to address the problems without making shit up. On the other hand, the story tries to invoke classic werewolf lore accompanied with the introduction of a cool-looking vampire. The freak show aspect also serves as an interesting novelty to the series. Had they only stopped while they were ahead this could have easily been on part 5's level. I don't know...maybe the flaws had something to do with this being made in the dreaded early '90s.

The main guy, Ian, is tracking a traveling freak show run by a guy named Harker, played by, the always villainous, Bruce Payne. Ian manages to pick up work in a shitty town as he masks the fact that he's a werewolf. Right from the onset, the problems begin as Ian is a traditional werewolf in the fact that the full moon triggers his transformation uncontrollably. I typically wouldn't have a problem with this notion, but they just had to throw in the werewolf from part 5, Mary Lou, in a small cameo! That means we are still technically dealing with the same universe of werewolves as always who can transform at will; making matters worse, the werewolf design is horrendous. This cameo does help us conclude that perhaps Mary Lou was looking for a mate in part 5. Still...they wasted an opportunity to expand upon the storyline.

Anyway, wherever Harker goes, people end up dead which once included Ian's family. Again, things make no sense as Ian claims Harker turned him into a werewolf yet we learn Harker is really a vampire. Uh...how is that possible? Keep in mind I'm stretching to the heavens with this theory, but what if Harker was the one killing off the parents of those cursed from part 5? Since the cursed descendants had the potential to be werewolves, maybe Ian being bitten by a vampire caused this abnormality of a werewolf form. This theory wouldn't explain why Ian follows the typical lunar cycle bullshit, but it would address how Harker can use a crystal and a chant that forces Ian to transform when the moon is not full. Harker clearly knows about werewolves, Mary Lou did show up, and Ian's back story does match that of the cursed descendants. I suppose you could make up a flow of events that explains most of it away.

By the end, one of Ian's friends at the freak show helps Ian transform in order to fight Harker. This was questionable since Ian as a werewolf couldn't even break shackles, yet, Harker could flip a truck with one hand, take multiple shotgun shells to the chest without flinching, and move so fast it was like teleporting. Yeah...goodnight Ian. I am glad that they made vampires extremely powerful, but Harker is killed extremely easy as they realize it's daylight all of a sudden. Funny, I was thinking it was closer to midnight when the final showdown occurred but whatever. Harker appears to just keel over dead the moment sunlight hits him and turns to dust. With that said, I did enjoy all the nods to "Dracula" they included.

Despite the holes, I still think this was a decent entry that is actually worth watching--independently of the Howling franchise if need be. Similarly to part 5, this can stand on its own, but you do have more plot holes from that perspective. The take on the werewolf and vampire felt reminiscent of Universal's take on the creatures which was a nice touch. The story is surprisingly engaging and evenly paced as part 5 was. Although I would have preferred a direct continuation of part 5, this was still a decent entry in the grand scheme of the franchise. In fact, considering what little they had to work with, part 5 and 6 turned out remarkably well. As for part 7 on the other hand...

Notable Moment: When Mary Lou appears at the freak show. They could have made so much more of that plot line in the right hands.

Final Rating: 5.5/10

Howling V: The Rebirth Review

Disclaimer: Contains spoilers!

Plot Summary: Strangers are invited to a castle's reopening as they discover a bizarre connection to one another--I wonder if it has anything to do with werewolves...

Review: Setting aside that this is a blatant ripoff of "The Beast Must Die," I feel this is the best film in the franchise--easily rivaling part one. I'm sure many Howling fans will not agree with that assessment, but, unlike part one, this film was actually pretty creepy and didn't overkill with the werewolves. They also wisely removed the horny werewolves, added moody atmosphere, unsettling music, and an intriguing mystery. On top of that, none of the entries in this franchise, including part one, could be considered remotely scary except this one; you really had no idea when or where the werewolf was going to appear. I'm not saying this film is perfect, because it is quite flawed with all manner of plot holes the viewer must fill in on their own or accept the nonsense as presented. However, for what it was, and considering this is a part 5 after all, they managed to pull off a respectable addition that avoided a lot of the pitfalls of the past entries.

The story begins 500 years ago in Hungary as a castle's court are either killed or kill themselves. They later explain that this was due to them all being cursed to be werewolves or to have the potential; I really don't know. In the "present" we meet a handful of people who have been invited to the castle's reopening, but, in actuality, they are the descendants of a baby that survived that massacre. There are some problems with this plot that needed fleshing out or they hoped to fill in the gaps with future installments. They imply each descendant grew up as an orphan--how? This would imply someone or thing was actively consolidating the descendants, but for what purpose? This movie briefly explains that there is an order of werewolf hunters (never shown), but it wouldn't make sense that they would spare the offspring if they were worried about one being a werewolf. Does the birth of a new cursed person magically kill off the parents? Ehh...we can make up whatever. Nevertheless, one of the people invited to the castle is secretly a werewolf.

As they investigate the castle, the visitors quickly realize the organizer, a count, is hiding something just as a blizzard rolls in to trap them all. Shortly after this, isolated individuals are picked off one by one by the werewolf. You might not think they would set this scenario up competently, but the atmosphere is surprisingly well done; the claustrophobic corridors and effective lighting were great. Of course I question the werewolf's ability to know the castle's layout, but they do infer a telepathic link between the descendants and a sort of longing to be at this location; maybe there was more to those birthmarks or something. On the other hand, fans have theorized that there were two werewolves all along. I do agree, there are quite a few inconsistencies that could be explained away by a second werewolf. There was the whole subplot about the group hitting "something" on their way to the castle. One character claims to suspect there is more than one, and the werewolf does do a few teleportation acts. Bad editing, plot contrivances, or was there more to it? I will say this, when you learn the werewolf is one of the ladies, I think it could have been very plausible that she was drawn to a mate already at the castle. At the same time, there is the ambiguity of the werewolves being magically birthed from Satan so maybe the devil himself was creeping about.

So yes, you eventually discover the werewolf was this one girl, an actress, who tricked everyone into thinking she was innocent. The movie actually ends with only her and another guy alive, but she gives a creepy smile at the camera as the other guy says werewolves aren't real--believing the count was crazy. Despite a kind of cool twist, there are problems with this revelation. For one, she wears the same set of clothes all movie yet it is implied she transforms on a whim in front of some victims. Continuity error or bullshit? When one guy gets killed we are meant to believe she was just soundly sleeping right there?! There are multiple instances where the girl is isolated with someone but chose not to kill them for whatever reason. Why does the count and everyone else assume the werewolf is among the remaining cast instead of a character who disappeared?

A few other things worth mentioning: they never explain if the bullets in the count's gun were silver. This werewolf is a lot more powerful than the previous ones we've seen, yet, it has no desire to turn others into one? I wish they didn't leave so much ambiguous in regard to the mythos since we're ignoring the other installments. Are there a bunch of werewolves out there? Is this the last one? Is this supposed to be the origin of all the other werewolves we've seen in this franchise?

I have my issues with this film, but I see a lot of potential to be explored compared to the other disasters. The movie was successful at presenting an engaging mystery that isn't overtly obvious and leaves plenty of room for further speculation; that old school, "whodunnit" plot line worked wonders in breathing new life to this series. Having the werewolf lurking more in the shadows, with only sporadic shots, worked in their favor in a manner similar to "Jaws." The tension is decent as you are on guard for when the werewolf will appear next. While the flaws I've outlined are considerable, they don't ruin the experience in the way the shoddy editing kills the fun of part 2. Overall, this was the best entry for me, and I actually believe this is a cool movie in general that stands on its own merit without the other sequels.

Notable Moment: When the one guy gets killed out in the snow. Yeah...because the werewolf was totally like, "Okay, I'm going to let you live since you're unconscious, but I'm going to build a little snowfort to pop out of since I psychically know your next move will be to go outside." Come the fuck on!

Final Rating: 6/10

Howling IV: The Original Nightmare Review

Disclaimer: Contains spoilers!

Plot Summary: Recovering from a psychotic episode. a writer stays at a cabin nearby a town full of werewolves.

Review: After the overwhelming levels of shenanigans in the last two entries, they tried to go back to the basics with part 4. Perhaps they went a little too far back? The story is all too similar to the first film, albeit, a closer adaptation of the book. At the same time, they made a few missteps that could have been golden opportunities to put this franchise on track. For one, the werewolves don't show up until extremely late in the game, and it didn't help that the only good shot of a werewolf we got looked like Cellar Dweller; the rest appear as mere wild dogs. Then there were those dumb psychic visions--where did those come from? I have my own explanation that could have worked, but the movie doesn't acknowledge this and they sort of lose relevance by the end. I don't know about you, but I'm getting tired of horny werewolves. We're four movies in and all these dumb creatures ever seem to do is want to fuck. I prefer my werewolves as bloodthirsty killers who rip you to shreds. Plus, this film and the last both imply werewolves die to any old method. What the hell? It's silver or get the fuck out.

So the story focuses on a writer, named Marie, who inexplicably pulls psychic visions out of her ass. I suppose we could assume she's had them her whole life, and used them for her writing, but, given the events of the film, that would be highly unlikely. Sometimes she can see the past while other times it's the future. Right. Using these visions as a contrivance to get the plot rolling, Marie and her wannabe Richard Marx husband...named Richard...stay at a cabin in the woods so that Marie can regain her focus with writing. Needless to say, the whole town near the cabin is infested with werewolves yet again. Though, why is this town supposed to be redneck territory despite being in driving distance from Los Angeles? And again, the husband is seduced by a werewolf girl. But of course! Surprisingly, the intrigue isn't too bad as you are left wondering what's going on for a time; there is this whole subplot about a nun that tried to exorcise the werewolves believing them to be demons.

We get a lot of howling and POV shots of the wolfies, but that doesn't cut it; I don't think the first legit shot is until the hour mark. Richard Marx becomes a werewolf at one point, but I don't fully understand his transformation. So each time the werewolves transform they become chocolate milkshakes or is that supposed to be what happens when you pop your wolfie cherry? And were those assholes chanting something about Satan? Uhh...okay. By the last 15 minutes or so, the movie finally picks up with a pretty cool final showdown with the werewolves. One of Marie's friends, another nun, lures the werewolves to a bell tower while Marie burns their candy asses. Don't worry though, we get a nice cornball zinger to close it out.

Overall, this was an improvement over the last two movies, in terms of quality, but nothing really happens and things get boring quick. I felt like the biggest waste was not throwing in a twist that was sitting right there. Make Marie the werewolf! Forget the whole town of werewolves bullshit as that is seen coming a million miles away. That should have been the red herring. The visions shouldn't have been stupid visions in the first place as that makes no damn sense anyway. They should have been memories of Marie as a werewolf. In other words, instead of visions of dead people, she is remembering people she killed. Plus, she's supposed to be a writer with a vivid imagination, right? Her "imagination" should have been the things she saw and did as a werewolf. Besides, we don't know what kind of books she writes--a great opportunity for a hint. When the husband explained how he chose the cabin, they could have threw in a subtle hint that Marie had been there before to help inspire her writing. The whole movie could have been a buildup to the revelation that Marie, was, in fact, a werewolf all along and end it with her eating Richard Marx or getting shot by Christoper Lee for all I care. Finally, this would fit the notion of "original nightmare" better as they would go back to the roots of werewolf lore; people who are cursed to be werewolves and don't necessarily even know what they're doing. Oh well. For what it is, this is one of the moderate entries in the franchise--it's not terrible, but it's not good either.

Notable Moment: The moment those opening credits roll. If you had any concern whether you were watching an '80s movie, those doubts should be immediately alleviated.

Final Rating: 5/10