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Thursday, May 29, 2014

Sick Nurses Review


Disclaimer: Contains spoilers!

Plot Summary: A ghost seeks revenge against those that killed her in a night full of shenanigans.

Review: Okay, this is yet another movie about to be taken away from Netflix streaming. I definitely should think up something special to refer to these movies as...but what to call it? Anyway, this isn't exactly a film worth crying over the removal. Now I'm not saying this is anywhere remotely as shitty as "Episode 50" was, but it's certainly not a good movie either. The main problem is that this movie doesn't really have a story. It's kind of hard to explain unless you watch it, but you simply get one segment after another of the ghost slowly killing a nurse with little understanding of what's going on until the end. And even by the end, there are still a ton of unanswered questions leaving the audience in the dark.

To start things off we have the murder of the one nurse that becomes a ghost. There are six other nurses and the main doctor who are apart of a scheme to sell dead bodies and that one nurse was going to blab on them. Don't even worry about the dead body plotline since it's nothing more than a huge ass contrivance to have the dead girl's body hanging around for the end scene. Forget anyone's names and stick with this: there's one nurse that loves eating, one obsessed with fitness, one obsessed with her looks, twins, and one that is the doctor's chickadee and sister to the dead nurse. Eh, they try to make the nurses sexy, wearing random outfits I don't think would be acceptable at any hospital, and they are cute, but they don't really have the look I prefer. Besides not wearing proper attire, the nurses also appear to just lounge around together doing whatever they want. I thought this is a hospital? Where are the patients and staff? Am I missing something? After participating in murder just a week ago, they're already joking about the dead nurse coming back to haunt them...which of course she does. I'll give the film credit in this regard, they don't play around as the ghost pops up and gets to work almost immediately. The makeup on the ghost is--umm--interesting to say the least; she's like a reverse Kayako or something with all black skin. I wouldn't say she's all that scary, mostly due to shitty lighting, but she does come off quite intimidating which is good enough I suppose. I mean, there are a few cool moments when she comes off creepy, but too often she's seen just standing in the open. Her powers are kind of all over the place as she can pretty much do anything with special attention to controlling the victim's bodies. The deaths are long and dragged out, but they aren't anything memorable; however, the nurses are all bitchy so their deaths do feel satisfying. In fact, only one nurse was okay and she is spared by the ghost, but she decides to commit suicide anyway for some reason. I should note that the ghost comes to each nurse at the same time; this is why they keep cutting to a clock and so little time is supposed to be passing.

The only story aspects we learn are that at one point the dead nurse was dating the doctor and the sister stole him. The sister is also pregnant which kind of connects to the story but not crucially. The doctor spends a lot of the movie roaming around reminiscing which is pretty much the only way the story does move forward. There's something going on with an award ceremony the doctor went to, but I have no idea what the hell that was all about since it was just filler as far as I can tell. At one point the doctor starts remembering some guy that we learn was his gay lover. We finally learn the main twist of the movie was that the ghost nurse was actually once that gay lover who got a sex change. What? That really makes no sense, but I'll go with it for a moment. The ghost appears to the doctor in a wedding gown and tries to approach the doctor when the seemingly dead chickadee burns the body that, like I said, was conveniently kept around. This appears to destroy the spirit for good, but then the ghost is suddenly born from the pregnant chickadee except the ghost has reemerged in the original male form. Then we get a scene during the credits of the nurses all playing at the beach. Umm...okay. Yeah, let's consider a few things. If the doctor is bi, why would it matter what gender his lover is? If the doctor is gay, why would he want the sister? Actually, we see a scene of the doctor kicking it to every nurse at one point. We could assume this seduction was how he was able get everyone to go along with his scheme with the dead bodies, but we don't know shit about anyone's motives. Plus, let's say your the chickadee for a second. You know your brother got a sex change to be with the doctor and you want to date that doctor? Huh?! I think most women would realize that's a mess you don't want to sort out. And did all the other nurses know she was a tranny too? They don't appear to know, but that leaves us wondering how long any of these people really knew each other. I'm sure they thought this would be a cool twist, but there is a huge ass gap in the plot that needed filling.

I know this may sound worse than it is, but the movie can be entertaining. I really liked the music as it added a nice somber tone as the ghost was deserving of revenge; and it also helped to show the ghost was reasonable by sparing the one twin nurse that said she was sorry and that was genuinely against the murder. Likewise, it was nice that the ghost had a few chances to stand out in a landscape full of Sadako and Kayako clones. The pacing is good with the action beginning from the start and not letting up until the end. While the twist wasn't thought out enough, it is somewhat original and unpredictable. But, like I said, most of these cooler aspects are cancelled out by the sheer pointlessness of everything. We don't know shit about what's going on or why and are meant to merely accept the situation at hand. If there was a stronger story and we knew the characters a little better, I think this film had the potential to be significantly better. Oh well. I'd say missing out on this one won't be a deal breaker, but if this sounds intriguing to you you may find it a bit more enjoyable than I.

Notable Moment: When the nurse that loves eating decides to eat a donut in mid-stride of brushing her teeth. What the fuck? No one is that hungry.

Final Rating: 5.5/10

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