Disclaimer: Contains spoilers!
Plot Summary: A secretive excavation project reveals that the real Santa Claus has been frozen inside a mountain.
Review: Slowly covering films from across the globe, the addition of this movie adds Finland to the list. I've noticed "Rare Exports" on all kinds of holiday horror lists, as well as general Christmas lists, so it is gaining a bit of a cult following. After finally giving it a watch, I don't think I understand what the buzz was all about. Sure, it's a cool little flick, but it's not that good. The primary disappointment for me was the lack of a payoff to all the story's buildup. More than that, it's as if they weren't completely sure of how to handle the material. It's too dark to be family friendly yet too whimsical and lighthearted for horror fans. I don't know...maybe I expected too much.
If you completely stripped away the elements that take this to the R-rated level, you have a fun tale that spins the Santa Claus myth. The wonderfully snowy landscapes, the look of a traditional and timeless Christmas, and a tolerable, child main character all work wonders in conjunction. As it turns out, Santa was an evil creature that tortured bad children, and, I suppose, ate them. Centuries ago, people grew tired of this shit and managed to freeze him in a lake. These people then encased him inside a giant ice mountain or the mountain formed around the ice tomb or something. This all works quite well, and the mystery surrounding the plot is captivating. In fact, the ominous nature of the opening scenes are done amazingly well. When the main characters investigate the dig after Santa has been freed it felt straight out of "The Thing" in the best of ways. Although the characters have numerous comedic moments, they all run around with rifles and looked hardened; this helped in making it feel believable that these guys could handle themselves in this situation. Speaking of which, the actors perform admirably, successfully adding a certain charm to their characters. Once more, I have to applaud the notion that the main kid is not super annoying, but he did test my patience from time to time. Other than these facets, all I can say is the buildup is excellent up to a point and the cinematography was topnotch.
I'll admit, the film didn't really falter until it was all said and done, and I had time to digest the plot. Frustratingly, they keep hyping Santa's final reveal and complete escape from the ice, but it doesn't happen. As such, some of the events don't even make sense once you realize Santa didn't do anything in the movie; it was only his elves. There should have been a big spectacle at the end against Santa or at least have him escape right as he's blown up. Just something! Instead, he's simply blown up anticlimactically without any struggle. The actual main adversary of the film are the elves who make no sense. Where did they come from? Were they frozen with Santa? Were they always living in the area? This needed answering as it's too crucial to the plot to be left ambiguous. The other strange part that stops this from becoming any form of a classic was the handling of the male-only cast. Now, I'm not saying a movie needs females--especially considering how much "The Thing" influenced the plot--but this film straddled that disturbing line and crossed it at one point. We see a gratuitous amount of hairy dicks swinging in the wind, a scanning shot, from head to toe, of the main kid in his underwear, as well as excessive time spent with this kid in his underwear. What the hell? Imagine this done with an all female cast--scan shots of a little girl in her underwear and nothing but tits flapping around by the end--and try to tell me audiences would just shrug that off? Factor all of this in with the ending of how they domesticate the elves into liking children--this is like a pedophile's wet dream or something. If this film stuck with pure horror I would simply accept it as the bullshit that comes with the territory, but this is a fairy tale-esque Christmas movie for fuck's sake!
I can see the appeal of this film, but it lacked that special something to make it great. The first 30 minutes or so are fantastic--the story moves along with steadfast pacing to pull you in. However, once you realize what's happening, and see the resolution, it's disappointing. The potential to be so much better was there, but, as it stands, it's only an above average experience. I appreciate the polished visuals and amusing dialogue, but the inability to seal the deal leaves you unsatisfied. I would still suggest checking this out, but do not expect to be blown away. Also, understand that this is not kid-friendly in the least and far from a casual Christmas movie. Knowing all of this, with your expectations in check, you should have a good time.
Notable Moment: When all the kids are being carried around by the helicopter. How did none of these kids freeze and/or die?
Final Rating: 6/10
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