Hatchet Review

Disclaimer: Contains spoilers!

Plot Summary: A group of misfit travelers take an allegedly haunted boat tour as they stumble upon a real life ghost looking for blood.

Review: Think of this film as a parody/homage to '80s horror films with major emphasis on the "Friday the 13th" franchise (which I plan to get into very soon!). The presentation and style do not come off wholeheartedly as an '80s film would, but the quirkiness and entertainment value to the characters are a great send up. The villain, Victor Crowley, is a straightforward Jason nod right down to the fact that he is also played by Kane Hodder who is probably the most famous of the actors who donned the hockey mask. Victor's backstory, deformity, and overall presence are very much like Jason except that he makes more grunts and groans when taking damage unlike the silent "man behind the mask." If that weren't enough, you also have cameos from horror alumni such as Robert Englund and Tony Todd while there's a background character named Jack Cracker who is supposed to be like Crazy Ralph from "Friday the 13th."

The story is that some undisclosed amount of years ago, the deformed Victor Crowley lived in the Louisiana bayou with his father--sort of cut off from the world. The father kept Victor sheltered, but locals would still try to bully and bother the kid. I should note that Victor's dad is also played by Kane Hodder and that the young Victor is played by a woman oddly enough. So, one Halloween night a bunch of kids throw fireworks at Victor's house hoping to lure out the, now adult, Victor. Unexpectedly, the house caught on fire as Victor's father came home trying to rescue Victor. As the father tries to chop down the door with a hatchet, Victor stands up against the door when the hatchet slices through his head killing him. After ten years of a broken heart, the father dies and the ghost of Victor emerges to kill anyone who comes too close to his area of the bayou. We see the results firsthand of someone venturing too far into Crowley country as Robert Englund's character, Sampson, and his son die in the opening scene. Later we meet the ragtag group that goes on a haunted boat tour of the bayou that, of course, stumbles upon Victor. The main guys are Ben and Marcus visiting for Mardi Gras, then there is the local Marybeth, there is a wannabe "Girls Gone Wild" director with two dumbass girls accompanying him, a cliched, old tourist couple, and then the tour guide. Surprisingly, the fodder characters are sort of interesting and most are funny at times; the acting is decent enough and there are quite a few noticeable faces. After somehow getting the boat stuck, the group find themselves wandering near Crowley's house waiting to be picked off. We do learn a few slight twists such as Marybeth being Sampson's daughter looking for revenge, and the wannabe director was just some pervert guy. When everything is all said and done, the last people standing are Ben and Marybeth after Victor appears to be dead from impalement. Only moments later though, the two flee aboard a small boat that Victor attacks throwing Marybeth in the water as Ben is seemingly killed. The film ends with Victor holding on to a screaming Marybeth.

Victor's makeup effects are decent enough, looking kind of freaky, but he still looks too much like every other deformed hillbilly we've ever seen in film before despite him not being a hillbilly. The deaths are okay but nothing we haven't seen before and done better. Strangely, Victor takes damage from fighting people and can be hurt even if momentarily. I know they were trying to be as accurate to a Jason nod as possible, but Jason was presented more as a regenerating zombie whereby Victor is presented as a ghost so it doesn't fully work. Overall, I felt this film was able to create a kind of spiritual successor to the Jason franchise while supplying some solid moments; the details and nods scattered about showed that the makers were horror fans without a doubt. I liked the use of Louisiana and the bayou as a setting, but the Mardi Gras setting never contributed to the plot relevantly; also, discussing Halloween so often felt meaningless except to touch base with every famous slasher franchise. The film is extremely short with Victor coming off as a bit of a plot device to simply get the kills rolling rather than the full fledged drive to the story. This was some kind of problem in the writing because the majority of the story comes off more about Ben and Marcus then transitioning to be about Victor; the sequels would obviously fix this though. In the end, this was a better than expected homage to '80s slashers with some commendable moments and fun and engaging characters. But the main villain is nowhere near as memorable as they imagined, and there are a slew or problems with the presentation as they seemed to lose sight of what to focus on in the tributing process. With that said, this is a worthy modern slasher you should check out if you're a fan of the classics, but it's still nothing exceptional.

Notable Moment: When Marcus notices Jenna "itching" herself. It's funny because you know what Marcus is thinking and these kind of character nuances are always so funny to me.

Final Rating: 6/10