Tuesday, October 16, 2012
Halloween II (remake) Review
Check out my updated review here! https://thevagrantrises.blogspot.com/2018/10/updated-review-26-halloween-ii-2009.html
Disclaimer: Contains spoilers!
Plot Summary: After lying low for a year, Michael Myers decides now is the time to return to Haddonfield and finish what he started the previous Halloween.
Review: After the unbelievably terrible remake, we move on to the very loose remake of the second "Halloween" film which is also the final installment so far in this franchise. Well, you would think after 10 films in this franchise they could come up with some good ideas, but nope. I do see some glimpses of originality from Rob Zombie this time as he does want to do something different, but he just ends up going back into territory we already touched on during the "Thorn" universe as Jamie had a connection to Michael...well, now Laurie has a psychic connection with Michael for some odd reason. Like Jamie, Laurie also envisions herself as becoming like Michael and wearing the clown costume. This treading back into material already dropped for being too supernatural is really annoying because it makes me wish they just picked up with where six ended (did I really just write that?!). The first half hour or so of this film involves some hospital scenes that are similar to the original part two, but after that, it's all Rob Zombie from there on out. I did like these hospital scenes despite how weird all these dumb dream sequences were.! Plus, come on, a serial killer with mommy issues? How original. As if Michael's character wasn't ruined enough by the portrayal in the first remake. The hospital chase is suspenseful though and entertaining enough which is what I was hoping for from this whole film and the last remake. Laurie has been transformed into a huge, raging bitch while Loomis has been turned into a douchebag sellout. Their characters were already shallow in the remake, but I guess they figured, we ruined Michael, might as well ruin all the characters, right? I don't understand why after going through all the traumatic events of the last film, Laurie would be such a huge bitch? Then when she realizes she's Michael's sister, she really goes off the deep end. Loomis, on the other hand, was always this guy so obsessed with Michael that he was borderline a villain himself, yet they feel that would translate better into some guy just trying to make a quick buck off Michael Myers?! Whatever. Thankfully Annie, played by Danielle Harris again, has been changed into a normal character which sucks because they decided to kill her off needlessly. Getting back to Michael, this film makes some pretty idiotic decisions about how to approach him the second time around. First, this film can't be bothered to explain how Michael survived the bullet to his head at point blank range from a .357 magnum, but, decides on his off time, Michael is just a hobo moving about the countryside to stay under the radar. Desperately trying to explain what Michael does with his free time is one of those things that tells the audience this franchise has exhausted its storytelling abilities. I suppose it's not too bad when compared to the "Halloween" sacrilege committed later. Michael talks. Goddamnit...Michael fucking talks! It's only in the unrated version, but fuck, it happened! The other thing is that he lifts a car. A fucking car! I'm shaking my head in shame seriously. I can't even believe this shit. I always regret that I wasted my money watching the first remake in theaters, but luckily I did not make the same mistake twice. This shit is unforgivable. The film ends really stupid with little explanation as to what is happening and again ripping off part four, but I suppose there is a little closure since Michael is dead...for now. As I said, there were a few good ideas, and this film is an improvement over the abomination that is the first remake, but at the end of the day, this is just a stupid and unnecessary movie that thinks it is being more abstract and creative than it really is. Well, that wraps up this franchise. It sucks that most of these franchises end on a sour note, but that doesn't mean we can't keep appreciating the entries we love and of course the originals that spawn these sequels!
Notable Moment: When Laurie and her friends go to a Halloween party dressed as characters from the "Rocky Horror Picture Show." I really loved the look of the girls because they looked just like the characters. Other than that, just any scene with Danielle Harris as with the other stupid remake.
Final Rating: 3.5/10
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