Disclaimer: Contains spoilers!
Plot Summary: The third entry in this, increasingly, terrible horror anthology series.
Review: Part 2 was noticeably an improvement over the first entry, yet, here we are, taking a massive step back with part 3. You know, how in the hell does garbage like this have 3 movies already, and we can't get a "Trick 'r Treat 2" after all these years?! That should be a crime. Anyway, expect more of the same garbage-tier storytelling with this entry. I mean, the creators clearly aren't listening to my feedback...sooo...who is even watching this trash besides me?
Fake Trailers: These aren't as entertaining as the ones in part 2, but, hey, at least we get to see some titties this time! That has to count for something. Nevertheless, the fake trailers might still be the highlight of the movie as a whole.
Wraparound: Well, we have yet another return from dollar store Elvira. Obviously the idiots making this series haven't learned a thing, because she continues to only appear at the beginning and end of the film. I just can't grasp why she isn't there at the start and end of each segment to add commentary. Like, isn't that the entire purpose of including a host? All she would need is a corny quip or pun to wrap up the god-awful stories.
House of the Mummy: We start off with the best segment--not that that is saying much--so it's all downhill from here. Some guy is getting divorced and thinks he will earn money by charging people to see his haunted house attraction. While going to an antique store, he finds a mummy decoration that is cursed or whatever. Sure enough, the mummy comes to life and kills the ex-wife and her new boyfriend. By the end, the main guy becomes something like the disciple of the mummy. Eh, it's corny, but felt like an attempt at a "Creepshow" styled story. The character banter was okay for what it was too.
The Locksmith: Um, I guess the killer in this segment uses a doorknob attachment to kill people...some of them at least? I don't know. This was pretty bad but somehow still the second best segment. A couple moves into a house, a killer lives there, he pops up and kills everyone including the realtor and crew. Wowwee. I was not a fan of discount Rorschach either.
Old Man Gross: This is, without question, the worst segment. Forget going beyond good and evil, this is beyond stupid and retarded. I think these actors are supposed to be playing high school kids, but they look like they're in their forties. They break into some guy's house where they decide to immediately start fucking...except they claim he might be a psycho killer. Makes sense. Also, I like how all the characters are speaking loud, and no one can hear any of this in other parts of the house. Needless to say, this is one of the dumbest, most painful anthology stories I've endured. I know I've probably written something along those lines a dozen times at this point, but this one really ranks up there for idiocy and horrendous film making. What a piece of shit.
Hack-in-the-Box: Your guess is as good as mine as to what the fuck was happening in this dumbass story. Way to close out an anthology. Some girls have a demonic jack-in-the-box, and are armed with guns to take down whatever comes out. Of course things do not go as planned with all the girls dying to a pathetic puppet. I don't know what was the point since some of the fake trailers had more depth and explanations than this.
And there it is--part 3 in a terrible anthology series. Is this some kind of money laundering scheme or tax write-off? Believe it or not, I actually thought this might be at least okay since there was an improvement from part 1 to 2. Boy was I wrong. I guess if you're, like, one of the other 25 people besides me watching this shit then go for it. If you're just a viewer looking for a good movie to watch this Halloween then avoid this entire series like the plague.
Notable Moment: During the fake trailers when we see the one naked lady. Look, you know it was the only good moment in the whole movie!
Final Rating: 3.5/10
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