Nightmare (Chinese 2011) Review

Disclaimer: Contains spoilers!

Plot Summary: Some rich bitch thinks she's being haunted by her dead "friend" as lame drama unfolds.

Review: Don't be fooled by that Sadako-wannabe on the poster--this movie is not scary at all, and, in fact, this feels more like it should have been a Lifetime channel original. At first I thought I was watching the Korean movie, also called "Nightmare," since they begin exactly the same with a party and some chick committing suicide. Unfortunately for me, this movie was nowhere near as entertaining as the Korean film, but I forced myself to finish it nonetheless. The biggest problem is that this film is soooo fucking boring, and it has such a stupid twist ending that it cancels out a lot of the film's own shenanigans exasperating how stupid the entire experience felt. By the time the credits roll you will probably find yourself compelled to punch someone in the face as I did.

Almost nothing happens in this movie which is kind of surprising when you think about it. The story begins with some girl wearing a red dress committing suicide by jumping off a building in front of the main bitch. The film cuts to some time in the future (I don't care to remember) as the bitch is staying at some random house in the middle of nowhere conveniently. She starts to see the ghost of the suicide-girl and she appears to be scared of the color red. The boyfriend of suicide-girl has become a psychologist, which should contribute more to the plot, but comes off more as a contrivance and he is the worst psychologist I've ever heard of to boot. The bitch wants to romance the boyfriend since she's always wanted him, but he's still in love with suicide-girl. We are suddenly introduced to suicide-girl's twin sister that no one knew existed...hmm. Twin sister has a bullshit origin story, which will come to make no sense by the end, and she thinks she's being possessed or whatever by suicide-girl. The twin tries to get the boyfriend to uncover the reason why suicide-girl killed herself which is sort of self-explanatory but surrrre! The bitch continues to be haunted and grows more and more paranoid just as the boyfriend thinks the twin and the bitch are both crazy, but he feels obligated to get to the bottom of the mystery of his beloved suicide-girl. Supposedly the main thing that drove suicide-girl to kill herself was that she was not accepted into some study abroad program or something along those lines; as it turns out, the bitch was accepted instead. To make matters worse, the boyfriend was seduced by the bitch and suicide-girl walked in on the two banging. Blah blah we realize that the twin is dressing up as suicide-girl and scaring the bitch for revenge, but the twin doesn't have it in her to kill the bitch. More so, the bitch almost drowns and the twin ends up saving her instead. In one final stupid twist, some guy appears out of nowhere and reveals there is no twin, that suicide-girl never died and it was some elaborate hoax that makes no fucking sense and is the ultimate contrivance bullshit. Then there's something about the bitch's dad getting arrested for helping the bitch get into that study abroad award or whatever the hell it was. And everyone is all happy and good lord this movie fucking sucks! There were too many instances of supernatural bullshit yet it's supposed to all be in both girls' heads. Ugh, you have to see this shit for yourself to understand it, but I highly advise against that. Uh...I just want to punch someone...

This could have worked on some level if the plot weren't bouncing all over the place and there weren't important plot elements introduced late in the game. They were trying to create some cool imagery with the ghost, the color red, and an analysis of duality, but everything fails monumentally. All the scares, which sucked by the way, were all dreams or hallucinations which is so stupid when you realize, not only is none of it real but, that no one is even dead to begin with! Plus, why does suicide-girl think she's a twin? We get the how, but we never know the why. Don't even get me started on the hoax shit. I mean, seriously, if they saved the money that it cost to create the hoax and use it to pay for the study abroad program, wouldn't that have been the wiser option? Plus, all it did was confuse the bitch...for a revenge plan...that made no sense. AND, the bitch was a fucking BITCH and yet by the end they act like she's totally innocent. Grr! This movie blows. Trust me, don't waste your time with this one unless you are psyching yourself up for a fight and need to get angry fast.

Notable Moment: When the ghost appears in the refrigerator (that's a new one) for no reason and isn't even seen by the main girl. But if all the ghost appearances are hallucinations, why would the bitch imagine a hallucination she didn't even see?! Ahhh!

Final Rating: 4/10