The Red Shoes (Korean 2005) Review

Disclaimer: Contains spoilers!

Plot Summary: A troubled woman and her daughter find themselves haunted by an angry spirit after picking up a pair of cursed shoes.

Review: I knew I had made a mistake after I saw my own comments on imdb trashing this film (7 years ago). Well, nothing has changed--if anything, the second viewing was all the more frustrating. It's a shame too, because underneath all the pretentiousness, contrivances, cliches, and outright stupidity there was probably a good movie. This is to say, the source material, a fairytale of the same title, is particularly disturbing and ripe with potential to explore. However, the writer/director opted instead to pursue a story that makes almost no sense and delivers an ending so incoherent and forced you may find yourself spiraling into a homicidal rage after witnessing it. There is a fine line between spoon-feeding the audience and outright leaving them in the dark wondering what the hell they're even watching. What a fucking mess.

I'm just going to explain this shit in chronological order since the twists and turns are too stupid to tolerate anyway. Besides, the origin of the cursed shoes was infinitely more interesting than the main story. So...during WWII, Japan had occupied Korea and they were putting on a pro-Japanese ballet. There is a love triangle between two of the dancers, Oki and Keiko, and some dude; they really don't explain this enough. The main factor at work are these dumb pink shoes the ladies fight over since they were a token of affection from the dude. They even fight during a photo shoot that holds some relevance I'll try and explain later. At one point, Oki screws the dude with Keiko catching her. This leads to Oki going apeshit and killing Keiko. For whatever reason, the dude is cool with this and helps bury the body. Oki, clearly crazy, decides she wants those godforsaken shoes from the dead body and cuts off the legs in order to put them on. Later on, when performing the ballet, Oki can't control herself while wearing the shoes. When the dude tries to intervene, the two are supernaturally hung from a rope and choked to death with the precious shoes falling off. All these events are witnessed and explained by the Hunchback of Notre Dame who just happens to be alive more than 60 years after the events, hanging out in the same place, and just happens to run into the main chick. Yeah...that's a good one.

Now things get a bit ambiguous as to what the hell has been going on for the past 60+ years. You could say that a company using a photo of Keiko from that photo shoot is what awakened her spirit, but that's taking a big leap of faith in the writer's capabilities. Besides being a huge ass contrivance unto itself, why would her photo surfacing allow her spirit to do jack shit if we are to believe her essence is tied up with the shoes? Hmm. The other way to look at things is that the whole photo shit was a contrivance for the main characters to figure things out. If that's the case, seriously, what the hell has been going on with these shoes over the years since people end up dead or losing their feet? Wouldn't there be an epidemic of footless murders? No matter what, this entire plot is a contrivance one way or another. Also, it's good we see that the cops don't give a shit--lets this awesome story keep rolling uninterrupted by logic.

In the present, the main girl, Sun-jae, discovers her husband cheating and kills him--though the movie doesn't reveal this until the end; don't worry, it's not as if they even bother to explain how she covered up his murder all this time. She then discovers the beloved pink shoes which are promptly stolen by her annoying daughter, Tae-soo. By the way, get used to hearing the name Tae-soo as half the film's dialogue appears to be nothing but someone screaming the brat's name! I should note that the shoes do appear to partially control the mind of those who come into contact with it, but this is not consistent or thought out. In order to drag out the running time, Sun-jae finds a dumbass boyfriend who is a complete bitch. In fact, Sun-jae is a crazy bitch too and one of the most unlikable protagonists I could possibly think of; why her loverboy would ever be interested boggles my mind, but, then again, this is a movie and contrivances get what contrivances want.

Blah blah blah, a haunting sort of happens but makes little sense. The shoes kill some people whenever but not always. I don't fucking know. Add a dash of dead end plot lines and some padding sprinkled in for good measure. Sun-jae makes Quasimodo spill the beans about Keiko and they attempt to return her dumb shoes to her body. Thinking this is "The Return of the King," we get like 3 fake out endings or so as we realize how truly crazy Sun-jae is; though she seemed pretty damn crazy to me the whole time. We get that she killed the husband, but she also appears to have killed loverboy, every other victim of the film, and...Tae-soo as well...huh? Keiko emerges from the shadows, in an admittedly cool shot, as she seemingly kills Sun-jae. Then we get a shot of Keiko dancing and then Tae-soo dancing. Oh god...

In case you're wondering, why are the shoes pink if the title is about red shoes? You're not thinking pretentious enough! It's because everyone who wears them covers their blood on the shoes. As for Sun-jae killing everyone...wikipedia claims it's because she's the reincarnated Oki. Uhh...no? Where is there evidence for that? And fuck that, even if that was the intention, you want me to believe Sun-jae killed people who picked up the shoes then would put the shoes back so that she, personally, can pick them up? Yeah, okay. Something else that pissed me off was all the annoying relationship drama. My goodness, is this a horror movie or a fucking soap opera?! The only thing I liked about Sun-jae is that she made steak for dinner.

I don't know if anything I just wrote made sense, but that's this film's influence on me. There is surprisingly very little action going on here; it's nothing but bullshit drama used for padding. I explained the plot in a practical sense, but it doesn't reveal itself in such a way. That final reveal that Sun-jae has been killing everyone is nonsensical and off the charts stupid. I wanted to kill all the characters especially Tae-soo; one does not simply create a Jar Jar-esque character and get away with it. I don't know what else to say. If you love a ton of pretense, every Asian horror cliche under the sun, and a story with more holes than Swiss cheese, then be sure to check this out with my most humble blessing.

Notable Moment: When we finally get a good shot of Keiko in her ghost form at the end. Wow, what a complete waste of a respectable makeup effect.

Final Rating: 4.5/10